I do watch lots of movies and I do stray and watch something out of my usual range like DELIVERY MAN since I mostly enjoy watching sci-fi, horror, action, mystery, British comedy and drama, and foreign language films.  Sometimes this side trips in watching something out of my usual genres of choice comes up with a nice discovery.  Other times you end up with a bad movie like DELIVERY MAN which makes me feel like I know how to a small extent how painful it is to go through labor to deliver a child.  I am a guy and I will never know the pain that mothers go through to deliver a baby and I will not pretend to understand how painful it is for a mother during labor (and I apologize to any mother I offend with my analogy in this review).  However, DELIVERY MAN is such a turd that it makes me feel like I have been through labor as I struggled through watching this train wreck which has a few good moments and yet I found myself fast forwarding and going to the next chapter to see if this film actually improved.  Sadly, the last 20 minutes are the only great part of DELIVERY MAN like in the moments of relief a mother must feel after giving birth.

 

DELIVERY MAN is about lovable loser in debt David Wozniak (Vince Vaughn) who no one can depend on as he is always late to his job as a meat truck delivery driver, never there for his pregnant cop girlfriend (Colbie Smulders who gets more respect in THE AVENGERS than this movie), and has a scheme up his sleeve to pay off his eighty thousand dollars in debt (by growing pot in his apartment).   He even speaks in Spanish when debt collectors, lawyers, and even strangers show up in his apartment which provides one of the worst parts in this comedy that deserves a Razzie.  Anyway, David finds out he has fathered 533 children from his 693 sperm donations back in the mid-1990s (which he partly used to take his father, mother, and three brothers on a trip to Venice) and 142 of those children have a filed a lawsuit to find out the identity of the sperm donor (which David signed the agreements to the sperm bank under the pseudonym of Starbuck).   Against the best advice of his lawyer friend (Chris Pratt), David starts to know some of the children while keeping his identity as the father as secret.

 

DELIVERY MAN is no stretch for Vince Vaughn as it feels like he is in cruise control doing whatever unfunny improve moment he can think of.   I think the best funny moments comes out of the actor who plays David’s father.   I do wish the movie explored more of the legal implications of confidentiality as a sperm donor vs. children rights to know the sperm donor where DELIVERY MAN decides to play up the dramatic comedy moments of a loser who wants to find out if he wants to be a father (since many of those moments come off as lackluster and unfunny).   Maybe DELIVERY MAN sounded like a great idea on paper and perhaps it would have made a good movie if in the hands of a different writer and an actor other than Vince Vaughn (who really feels like he did this for the pay check).  On a final note, the alias of Starbuck makes me think that the character from the original BATTLESTAR GALACTICA fathered these children instead of a lovable loser played by Vince Vaughn.

 

SPECIAL FEATURES:

BUILDING FAMILY- this featurette explores the casting of the movie including the challenge of casting 142 actors who could look like they could be related to Vince Vaughn (and many of the 142 actors have kept in contact since the production of DELIVERY MAN has ended).

VINCE VAUGHN: OFF THE CUFF- all about the improv comedy of Vince Vaughn as you hear the cast and director talk about it

 

Rounding out the extras is a deleted scene where David is caught by his girlfriend growing pot in his apartment (which is a scene that could have been left in the movie to better explain why he threw the pot plants out), a 4 ½ minute blooper reel, and previews for NEED FOR SPEED and THOR: THE DARK WORLD.

 

FINAL ANALYSIS:   DELIVERY MAN is painfully bad and only fans of Vince Vaughn would be cautioned to see this turd.

 

This review is ©3-30-2014 David Blackwell and cannot be reprinted without permission. Send all comments to feedback@enterline-media.com

 

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